The phenomenon of micro-blogging

I am about to make the biggest non-scientific discovery of our times.

Micro-blogging becomes more popular as we become more stupid!

Yes, this is it!  All these sleepless nights and hours of constipation boiled down to this one realization.  We lack the ability to think in paragraphs and structured long-form, that the advent of SMS texting (Twitter) and two-sentence blogging (Tumblr) seems liberating.

Ah, here’s the other thing.   Fear of commitment is probably the second biggest factor.  You, my friend, don’t have to commit to 3+ paragraphs of intro, body and ending.  In a mere sentence, you just came up with your E=mc^2.    Even if — for the sake of argument — you have to make sense, and you fail — you can call your 140 character creation “abstract” and let people figure out what the fuck you are trying to say.  It is definitely convenient.

I follow a guy on Twitter who claims to write Twisters.  In other words, if you and I write tweets (140 characters of repeating what someone else wrote or said), this gentleman writes short stories.  Here’s one: “Pass me the salt, she said. I did not raise my head.  Why does she always ask for salt?”   — ok, I just came up with this one, but you get the point.  I do believe that he is a legitimate writer in his own right.  I’m pretty sure he is published – although I have not read any of his books.  Generally, I don’t read  …but I digress.

Where was I?  Yes, Twitter.  I like twitter. I don’t like what twitter is becoming.  In fact I don’t like that all of us who tweet somehow refer to ourselves as part of Media.  What the fuck do you publish?  You just repost links to articles you find on Huffington Post with the note “Wow, great article! ..must read!”   I know, that’s what I do!  Can I, all of a sudden, look forward to my Pulizer?  Didn’t think so!

Final thing, and I’ll close shop for tonight …or next few months.  Tumblr.  What the fuck is it?!  This thing is like the Kim Kardashian of blogging.  Famous for being famous.   I had someone try to explain it to me once.  “Dude, ..it’s like Twitter, but with pictures.  Like ..you on Twitter you have to click to see pictures.  Here, dude, you don’t …they kinda like pop up ..and shit!  ..and you can follow people ..and shit!  It’s fuckin’ awesome!”    Give me a minute, I’m throwing up …brb (Does anyone use this abbreviation anymore? Didn’t think so.)

Moral of the story is that I have to lay off of watermelon for a year,  and take more frequent naps.   Thanks for getting to the bottom of my rant.

 

 

 



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